Affirmation Letter of the Week: "I love you and this is..."

Written and read by Dear Black Woman Florence Noel, founder of Dear Black Women

I love you and this is something I want to say to you.

Certain pains can make you sick if you hold them too closely. So it’s okay to put them down for a while. Give the arms rest. Your arms that is, the ones that have been carrying deadly pains so close to your heart. It’s okay to give your heart space from the thing that threatens its heartbeat. Sometimes.

It’s okay to be cold for a while. Not dead, but cool to the touch. The opposite of warm and inviting. And if that’s dead, then it’s okay to be dead to the things that threaten your life for a while. Okay to step outside your body and wonder what your body might do next. Just until it’s safe enough to jump back in your body again and do that right thing.

It’s okay.

I’m not telling you to disappear and go numb and stay that way. I’m telling you that sometimes you have to take a break from the life you’ve lived to stop that life from breaking you.

And it’s okay. Okay to take a break sometimes.

And you don’t need explanation or special circumstance. You don’t need coherent announcements. You can just pull back more and more for a while and recede into the safe space you’ve abruptly fashioned for an emergency or for moments just like this.

And it’s okay.

Every fire that calls your name is not worthy of your answer. And every person who mimes love isn’t worthy of your love. Every scar you wear wasn’t always this small and sanitized. Some were once big and infected. So it’s okay to be still for a while and give time time and give space space and tell yourself that doing nothing is okay.

These words were not easy to say, because you were raised to be a fighter. Every single day of your life you were required to fight your way to the next day. But, it’s okay to put give yourself rest for a while.

Okay to decide: not today.